ROOTMIX [life-as-art]

1 month post-Oakland

Here’s where I stand a month after I was suppose to leave Oakland.

1. Stayed 2 days later in SF to downsize, donate, and ship-prep more of my stuff. Forgot to take my bike.

2. Drove southeast through California to take a left at the desert with stops at San Dimas, Blythe, Tucson, and arriving in Las Cruces two days after my Airbnb booking.

3. Wine tasting (no Malbec), wrong burritos, and bluegrass music 2 hours after arriving.

4. A full moon hike and new BFF connection with a retired teacher and multi-platformed artist on my first full day here.

5. Treated to the large house after the studio was suddenly scheduled for roof repair, learned of the great hail storm of Oct. ’15.

6. Shown where to get the bestest margaritas, 30 ways.

7. Hit up open mic night, heard some belters belt. It was good, as was my cocktail.

8. Going stag to that Super Bowl bar viewing, maintaining feminist boundaries by not responding to “where’s your husband/do you have any kids” openers. But otherwise having a fun time chatting it up. #winnerbesthat

9. Played detective, discovered my sleep IS drastically impacted by fabric softeners and dryer sheets, banned them from my room, sleep schedule has improved.

10. Working on perfecting my organic guacamole recipe.

11. Confirming just how different a home can look (and smell) online vs. IRL.

12. Consistently 2 days behind on sending home any cards or gifts.

13. Too much internet, happy when wifi went out.

14. Visited preggers horses, got petting-snubbed for my BFF. Didn’t take it personal.

15. OMG, you can totally take a week or more to contemplate leasing an apartment.

16. Found myself accepting wine, talking unicorns, sharing hot tub waters with 5 others under the stars, overlooking the Las Cruces lights.

17. Discovered the care-takingest, hipsterist coffee bar here. Check and check.

18. At least sheers two shifts of lifestyle-pace here vs. the Yay Area.

where i'm at and what my sights are set on

Today I pick up my keys to my new home. It's been 2 years since I've had my own place.

In that time I've lived:

oct 2013
parents for a month, looking
mission/la lengua nov-open feb
rented art studio dec 2013
feb 2014
got storage unit
back at parents due to illness
turned down bernal cut spot, allergies, too sick
housesat a week at ariah's, swam at temescal pool!
temescal end dec-mid march
gave up art studio jan 2014
march 2015
piedmont 2 sickening weeks in march
back at parents
*disability insurance finally kicking in, retro from previous may 2014
noe valley 3 months, dryer sheets right when i started settling in
turned down creepy hiked rent, no doorbell piedmont studio
5 days dog sitting in june
parents again
33 nights in san diego mid july-mid august
turned down room facing prostitution/drug house
10 days in new mexico, vacationing with ariah
sept 2015
signed lease for essex street!!!

I went from being super-sick where even anticipating being talked to hurt and caused me distress, impacting my fatigue and healing, having to avoid car exhaust, even a block away, covering face to breath when walking past chemicals, not being able to stay inside a highrise building without windows, to taking a 2.5 hour plane ride!!!

Healing progresses greatly in San Diego being out on the beach, breathing that air, being in the sun, having no agenda, sleeping surrounded by open windows. I've also eaten alkaline since May, avoiding sugar, flour, dairy (some cheese later), all fruit (some later). Some spurts of walking 2 miles a day. Also, being away from stressful family.

#magicyear

Unicorns, daily magic, bright surprises, happy days...

These are all elements of this special year I have set out to create and participate in joyfully from August 30th, 2015 and for the next 365 days.

What a treat to kick this off in The Land Of Enchantment, having visited inspiring artists and nature sites. Taos Pueblo, Millicent Rogers Museum, and the Georgia OKeefe museum.

I liked the things they liked and were attracted to the land and people as they were.

Focus for this first bit, until it's done, hopefully not longer than a month, arbitrary monthly focai...

Possessions - don't let 'em own YOU!

Take what I like and leave the rest. Home is faith, safety, comfort, and love. Those are mobile and stay with me.

I'll be confirming shop garage cleared out, taking that and home garage stuff to goodwill. Streamlining room stuff, and keeping bits sorted for use in storage, like kitchen, bathroom linens, etc. THEN I can start to redo storage items to see what I'm interested in now, at this time.

More updates when I'm inspired. Cuz that's how I flow.

today, getting ready for the awesome.

Dropping off my car at the auto shop, walking up a hill back to the house. Today I connected with my new business coach! She caught me on the phone having just taken care of a promptly addressed vehicle issue, on a walk for self-care, and enjoying the winter sun. All good signs saying yes to a year of coaching with Emily Utter is an amazing thing.

This will be the second time I officially work with an official coach. Over the summer I worked with the endearing Asha Ramakrishna and we focused on more spiritual blocks. I felt surges of progress, my flow being freed up after my sessions with Asha.

Now I'm choosing Emily as I need a simple, focused, straight-forward action plan to launch my purpose to the world. Yes, world-wide. Here are some signs that I am now ready to do the work.

These are all in relation to how things used to be.

calendar 1"square a day vs. 30 minute increments with daily focus, weekly personal and project focus,
hiring live-in housekeeper/cook vs. relishing processing the laundry and dishes for a 3-person household
hiring movers and stating I won't be able to lift anything due to my wrist aching, then moving again and not having any energy to assist and taking breaks vs. today loading up items from my house, my art studio, and my storage space, then cleaning my new room and unloading all. Word.

At the end of Summer, I alerted Asha to the fact I was moving 25% as fast as any healthy person. My recovery from a chronic illness was slowing me down by 75%, or taking 75% of my energy to recover while other folks would have space to apply to their projects.

I'm feeling that I'm almost ready to do more. And that's my new red flag, well, let's call it a pink flag, neon pink. The "I'm almost ready, hold on a second" is my new neon pink flag sending me into action. When I'm this close, there's really nothing more thrilling than just jumping. Take a big leap and the tree branch/net will rise up to meet you. Or you'll have fun butterflies in your tummy as you land, brush yourself off, and get up to take the ride one more time!

Good enough never is and almost ready is too late.

Starting point.

Tonight I:

1. Followed through with a commitment
2. Needed a drink after that
3. Reached out to a friend to drink with me (and more importantly, to talk)
4. Then, inspired, stayed up all night taking another step towards my focused vision, feeling distractions fall away

Why is it important to reach out?

I was bummed, I was humming with poo-poo energy. You know how everyone says, "you are the average of the five folks you hang around most"? Well, my average had just dropped, I had been around folks who really drained my energy. So, to boost back up my average and my energy I asked a friend who had proclaimed an all-nighter on social media, so I thought she'd be the most likely to entertain a late night meet up.

What a sweetie, she also treated me to my much needed and much refreshed wine-based cocktail :) #thanksjess

By reaching out I practiced asking for help, not having all the answers, and built my community a bit more.

And then I pulled an all-nighter.

#status:
on track with focus - #41x14, hi5, declutter

hype-links // edition No. 2 just really awesome links

This has gotten me back onto the blogging band wagon. It's why the internet is awesome.

Do you feel really conflict-y being an artist or entrepreneur?

"You get your intuition back when you make space for it, when you stop the chattering of the rational mind. The rational mind doesn’t nourish you. You assume that it gives you the truth, because the rational mind is the golden calf that this culture worships, but this is not true. Rationality squeezes out much that is rich and juicy and fascinating."